Monday, August 17, 2009

I can't sleep

I can't sleep...

I can't say exactly why. I know that if I fell asleep my dreams would not be an issue, lol. However my mind is going a hundred miles per hour. There is tons to think about and ponder. Day dreams to explore...

I'm really excited about the future. I don't think I've been this excited in some time. And the excitement isn't just from obvious reasons; my visions, as it were, have been quite clear and things are looking good. Well, the path I've choosen is the correct one, and things aren't going to end up like that horrid nightmare I had for 18 months (or something like that, those who know, know) and was just a fear being presented in dream form. Visions generally come from dreams, but not all dreams, even nightmares, are visions. That one was a nightmare, and that is it.

But I'm allowed my fears. Fears are natural and normal. It is when those fears rule our lives that there is an issue. Fears can cause us to send out unwarrented negative energy. Negative energy can endanger others if left unchecked. I will not endanger others with my fears. I have checked them. I think part of the fear is the lack of control I will have over that situation. However, I can not control everything. I have to remind myself of that fact often. I sometimes forget. However, I take control of what I can, actually and in reality, control. Such things are: school, whether I work at a job I like/don't like, who and where I hang out, you know things that I can control... Things I can't control though are like if some fool shows up where I'm at, my boss decides to be a douche, or UTA screws me outta of a grade (which they've done similar crap in the past).

So basically what I think I'm trying to get at is that I couldn't be any happier. Well, I could, but that requires it to be December, lol. Let me rephrase then, I could not be any happier right now!

No comments: